Who is Kim Chun? finding my identity...
well, i guess i'm depressed... things being happening ard me tat vexes me alot, and i seem to be not able to deal with them properly... going to ORD is gd but i just got a bomb from MOE regarding some stuff to do with my health... maybe i shd just die, it'd be much easier, think i shall get it officialised as smthg like a will to say tat i'd prefer death if i'm ever totally disabled... just give me an overdose of some substances for me to die a non-painful death...
next up is things at home, getting seriously irritated, or maybe exasperated wld be more apt here... seriously considering moving out on my own after i start NIE, i may have to do more household chores cos my mum wun be ard to help, but think it wun be too bad, can just send all formal wear to the cleaners so they come back ironed... but its gonna cost quite a bit haiz...
3rdly wld be abt myself... think i'm losing myself... i no longer know who i really am and wat i really want... its really like adolescence all over again, the identity crisis... i think i'm really quite depressed... suicide is seemingly a very gd choice at this point in time, but thankfully there are ppl ard who shared my burden...
think its really timely tat i went down to meridian just now, and happened to bump into claramae, i'm really thankful for her willingness to listen and support, it really took quite a load off my heart after tat, and i guess i caused qiaoping to have to wait quite a while for us, felt quite bad abt it, but also very thankful for the love and concern tat i was shown, even though i'm no longer under her responsibility to care for, she still cares very much, as a close fren. i cant really put into words how grateful i am for this fren, but i can just say tat she's the kind of fren whom i'll be willing to give up everything for. cos to me she's like a living manifestation of the kind of fren Jesus is, though not a perfect manifestation as yet. God, thank you for this fren and for using her to bring release and comfort in my time of need. Claramae, thank God for you.
another melancholic and quite random writing... i guess u all need to get used to this, until i step out of this seemingly very dark period of my life...
next up is things at home, getting seriously irritated, or maybe exasperated wld be more apt here... seriously considering moving out on my own after i start NIE, i may have to do more household chores cos my mum wun be ard to help, but think it wun be too bad, can just send all formal wear to the cleaners so they come back ironed... but its gonna cost quite a bit haiz...
3rdly wld be abt myself... think i'm losing myself... i no longer know who i really am and wat i really want... its really like adolescence all over again, the identity crisis... i think i'm really quite depressed... suicide is seemingly a very gd choice at this point in time, but thankfully there are ppl ard who shared my burden...
think its really timely tat i went down to meridian just now, and happened to bump into claramae, i'm really thankful for her willingness to listen and support, it really took quite a load off my heart after tat, and i guess i caused qiaoping to have to wait quite a while for us, felt quite bad abt it, but also very thankful for the love and concern tat i was shown, even though i'm no longer under her responsibility to care for, she still cares very much, as a close fren. i cant really put into words how grateful i am for this fren, but i can just say tat she's the kind of fren whom i'll be willing to give up everything for. cos to me she's like a living manifestation of the kind of fren Jesus is, though not a perfect manifestation as yet. God, thank you for this fren and for using her to bring release and comfort in my time of need. Claramae, thank God for you.
another melancholic and quite random writing... i guess u all need to get used to this, until i step out of this seemingly very dark period of my life...
3 Comments:
At Mon Jun 04, 01:06:00 AM GMT+8,
Anonymous said…
hey bro... just dun die on me okie... anything call me...
At Mon Jun 04, 02:12:00 AM GMT+8,
Nathaniel said…
thx bro, i wun, dun worry (",) God has been providing me with many ways out of this depressing state, will call u to meet up more
At Mon Jun 11, 09:53:00 AM GMT+8,
Anonymous said…
Hey Bro,
Don't worry about it too much, believe God will help you get over this mini-quater life crisis and he will help you straighten your thoughts, something you are strong at as well.
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